Tending Tara (Alaska Blizzard Book 8) Read online

  “This was great, right?” Charli asked, glancing into the back seat where Tara was sitting.

  “You like Donovan?” Miikka asked.

  “Yes, he’s nice.” Tara nodded.

  “But do you like-like him?” Charli pressed.

  “I barely know him,” Tara responded. “Why?”

  “You held his hand this morning,” Miikka said.

  As if she didn’t already know that.

  “I was nervous about my jaw,” she protested. “He was just being nice. There’s nothing going on, you guys.”

  “Bummer,” Miikka said. “Donovan is a good guy.”

  “No time, and we still don’t even know if I’ll be able to stay,” she replied. “We’re friends, though, and that’s okay. I needed a friend today when I got hit.”

  “Are you going to keep playing?” Charli asked.

  “Dr. Newman said to take it easy for a week, but I think so, yes. Nothing was broken or fractured, and I don’t want to give up hockey.”

  “Don’t tell Aiti,” Miikka muttered. Mom. “She’ll kill me, say I’m not taking care of you.”

  “It was an accident.” Tara laughed. “And I’m fine.”

  4

  The team left on a road trip two days later, and Donovan fell into his normal on-the-road routine. He hung out with some of his teammates, but mostly he kept to himself. He’d always been a bit of a loner, and though he spent time with the guys, there was a part of him that had already started pulling away. His agent had said to settle into the season and there would be interest. They had to wait to see who wasn’t playing well, look out for injuries, things like that. It was a little morbid, but it happened, and it wasn’t his fault, so he was biding his time, doing what he was told.

  They were in Buffalo this weekend, which didn’t help his melancholy mood since it was where his ex-wife was. They’d spent summers here, and it was where she’d moved after the divorce. He had a feeling he would hear from her and wasn’t surprised when her name flashed on the screen of his phone while he was in his hotel room relaxing before the game.

  He ignored the call, put the phone on the nightstand, and closed his eyes. The last thing he needed was a booty call with his ex. Jane was beautiful, and their sex life had been insanely good. She was into anything and everything, sometimes to the point he’d yearned to tone it down, maybe try some straight missionary for once. Not that he wasn’t willing to get wild now and then, but Jane was all about pushing the envelope, all the time, and after six years, it had gotten old.

  He dozed for two hours and found three messages from Jane when he got up to head to the arena, so he deleted them without listening. He’d made the mistake of hooking up with her at the end of last season when they’d played in Buffalo, and then she’d started making noises about him getting traded to the East Coast, maybe giving the marriage another go. And that was a big fucking no. He’d loved her once, but not anymore, and he knew her well enough to know she would be as unhappy in Philadelphia or Boston as she’d been at the idea of moving to Anchorage.

  “Hey.” Jake Carruthers, the team captain, fell into step beside him once they got to the arena. “You ready for tonight?”

  “Always ready,” Donovan laughed. “Now if Coach would just put me in…”

  “You have a great job, making lots of money, on a team with good friends,” Jake said. “It’s a pretty cushy gig, if you think about it. You don’t have the pressure or as big a risk of injury, which sounds pretty damn good to me.”

  Donovan nodded. “I know, and I love it here, but I should be a starter somewhere. I should be at the top of my game. Would you be happy as the back-up who never got on the ice?”

  “Probably not,” Jake admitted. “But you’re a hell of a goalie, and you’re only twenty-seven. We count on you, knowing you’re always ready to jump in if Aaron needs you to, and there’s something to be said about being the guy who can save the day.”

  “Yeah, I know.” Donovan shrugged.

  “You still looking to get traded?” Jake asked under his breath, pausing as they got to the locker room.

  “I’m keeping my options open,” he said cautiously. “I’m not actively looking to go somewhere, but if the right situation opens up, I’ll consider it.”

  “I’d hate to see you go,” Jake said quietly. “But I understand that you want more, that you’re itching to be the starter.”

  “I’d appreciate if this stayed between us,” Donovan said. “Unless and until something changes, I’m a hundred percent invested in my job here.”

  “I get it, so don’t give it another thought. I won’t say a word.”

  Donovan had been expecting Jane to show up after the game, and he was surprised instead to see his ex-brother-in-law, Jane’s younger brother, Wade. Donovan hadn’t seen him in over a year and gave him a hug. They’d been close once, and it had been hard not being able to say goodbye to everyone. Jane had asked him not to, though, because her family had loved him and she didn’t want them to take his side.

  “What’re you doing here?” he asked Wade after they exchanged pleasantries. “I didn’t think I’d see you.”

  “You were my brother for a long time, and you never said goodbye.”

  Donovan sighed. He hated throwing Jane under the bus, but he wasn’t sure what else to do. “Jane asked me not to come around. Said it would be easier on her not to see me around the family.”

  “Because she knew we were all on your side.” Wade smiled wryly.

  “She’s your sister,” Donovan said gently. “You shouldn’t side against her.”

  “She’s a pain in my ass,” he said. “But she’s miserable and knows she made a huge mistake. She’s just too proud to admit it.”

  “I don’t know what you want me to say,” Donovan said after a moment, caught by surprise by Wade’s comment.

  “I think if you talked to her, she’d be willing to move to Alaska now.” He met Donovan’s gaze almost guiltily.

  “Wade, that ship has sailed. I loved her once, but she hurt me, and I’ve kind of moved on.”

  “Yeah, I was afraid of that. I thought I’d give it a shot, though.”

  Donovan smiled. “She’s been calling me all day. Tell her I’m sorry, okay?”

  “I will.” Wade paused. “She great?”

  “Who?”

  “Your new girl. Is she awesome?”

  Donovan hated lying to him, so he winked, hoping he’d drop it. “Yeah. She’s pretty great.”

  “Blonde or brunette?”

  He nearly groaned, a vision of Tara flitting through his mind since she was the closest thing he had to someone new at this point. He didn’t want to lie to Wade, but it was better if everyone in Jane’s family thought he’d moved on. “Uh, redhead.”

  “You happy?”

  “Yeah. You know, taking it slow, but she’s a good girl. Teammate’s sister.” Oh, hell, why had he told him that?

  “Right on. Well, I’m happy for you. I’ll tell Jane I didn’t get to see you, that you’d already taken off. Easier that way.”

  “It’s all good, brother.”

  Donovan turned and headed toward the bus, wondering why he’d thought of Tara the minute he’d needed to come up with a girlfriend. He’d been thinking about her a little too much since their movie date. It hadn’t been a real date, after all. He’d just been hanging out with Miikka and Charli, and Tara had been an added bonus. A bonus with long red hair that had streaks of honey-blonde in it, and stormy blue eyes. And long legs that filled out a pair of jeans. Dammit, he was thinking about her again.

  “Who was your friend?” Miikka asked, sitting next to him on the bus as they headed back to the hotel.

  “My ex-brother-in-law. My ex-wife is his sister.”

  “You’re close?”

  “We were. She asked me to stay away from her family when we separated because they all loved me. I didn’t want to make things harder for her, so I did it.”

  “You miss her?”

/>   “I miss her family. Jane and I grew apart, and honestly, she wasn’t right for me.”

  “So now you are ready to move on?”

  He chuckled. “If the right woman and the right opportunity arises, sure.”

  “This is good news.”

  “How come?”

  Miikka just grinned. “Maybe I have an idea.”

  5

  Crying babies were usually no big deal, but Matthew had been crying all night, and with both Gage and Laurel out of town, Tara was exhausted.

  “Come on, sweetie, just close your eyes,” she whispered, rocking him against her chest. Matthew whimpered a little before starting to doze off. It was five thirty, and she’d been up with him all night. She was supposed to be waking up for the day in an hour and a half or so, but she needed to sleep a little. She slowly sank onto the bed, still holding Matthew, hoping he wouldn’t wake up.

  Normally, she wouldn’t bring him to bed with her, but he’d been off-kilter last night, and she needed at least a few hours’ sleep. She leaned back against the pillows and closed her eyes, cuddling the baby closer. Just a couple of hours was all she needed, and then she’d get up.

  She’d just started to fall asleep when her phone buzzed, and she grabbed it, hoping to keep it quiet so it wouldn’t wake Matthew, who’d finally settled down. It was a text from Saku, and she was about to put the phone down when it buzzed again. Matthew stirred, and she angrily opened the texting app.

  TARA: Stop texting me! You’re going to wake the baby.

  SAKU: You have a baby?!

  TARA: I’m babysitting, moron.

  SAKU: Can we talk?

  TARA: No, we can’t. And anyway, you’re married.

  SAKU: I miss you.

  TARA: We’re not doing this. I have to go. Please stop texting.

  SAKU: I’ll text in a few hours when you’re awake.

  She put the phone down and sighed, closing her eyes. It had been such a shock when Saku’s mother told one of Tara’s mother’s neighbors about Saku and Jaana’s impromptu wedding. Jaana and Miikka had been together since they were ten years old, but she hadn’t wanted to leave Finland to follow him and his hockey career. Tara didn’t agree with it, but she understood. She just wished Jaana hadn’t dragged it on for so long, but not everyone wanted to follow a man around, especially not if she had to leave her country, her family, and everything she knew.

  Saku was another story. Tara had met him her first year at university. He’d been charismatic, smart, and lots of fun. They’d fallen in love, moved in together, and made a plan. Unfortunately, Saku liked the fun parts of being in a relationship much more than school or planning for the future. He’d dropped out of university and joined a band. Then he’d gotten a job working on a fishing boat. Once that got too hard, he’d talked about going back to school, but that hadn’t happened, either.

  She’d been struggling, too, trying to find a job teaching English that could support both of them until he got his act together. Except he wasn’t interested in finding work, and when she’d gotten tired of his laziness, he’d started going out more and spending less time with her. He’d mentioned starting a family a few times, and when she’d asked him how they would support children, he’d gotten angry, called her names. He’d had the nerve to call her a gold digger, which was ironic for a guy who couldn’t hold down a job.

  Then he’d cheated, and that had been the end for her. Finding him in their bed with Jaana had been the very last straw. Seven wasted years. Last she’d heard, Jaana was pregnant, and she and Saku were living with Jaana’s parents. Why Jaana would want to marry someone lazy and unfaithful, Tara had no idea, but hearing him say he missed her made her want to roll her eyes. She honestly hadn’t thought about him much since leaving Finland.

  Coming to America had been wonderful for Tara. It was so different from Finland, but she loved it. For her, it was an adventure, and since she had Miikka, it was a lot easier to adjust. The friends she’d made were wonderful, she liked working for Gage and Laurel and living in their amazing mansion, and she was getting to know her sweet new sister-in-law. She also got to play hockey regularly and explore a place like Anchorage, which hadn’t been a place she might have visited otherwise.

  All in all, she was having fun.

  Last night with Matthew hadn’t been that much fun, but in general, she didn’t mind. She loved kids and wanted a few of her own, just not yet. She wasn’t ready for that kind of responsibility. It was hard to explain because she didn’t have anything specific she wanted to do, but there was a part of her that was searching for something. That had been part of the problem with her and Saku. He hadn’t understood her restless nature, her desire to travel and learn new skills and experience new things. He’d never understood why she wasn’t happy sitting home, working a boring job, hanging out with the same friends every weekend.

  If she was honest with herself, she didn’t understand it, either.

  She was easily bored, but she’d thought it was because she hadn’t found the right job yet. So she’d moved around, tried different things, and took night classes. And none of it helped. When she’d dumped Saku, it occurred to her she was free; she could do anything she wanted. And now she was here.

  The problem was that even though she was having fun, it was hard to really settle in because of the situation with her visa. She had a temporary visa, but they hadn’t heard anything, and she didn’t know what she’d do if they turned her down. Gage had told her not to worry about it, but it had been two months, and she still hadn’t been approved.

  Despite her racing thoughts, she’d dozed off at some point, and the next time she opened her eyes, it was after eight. Matthew was still fast asleep, and she quietly slipped out of bed to use the bathroom, hoping she wouldn’t wake him. She was tired, but she’d take a nap later and would feel better. For now, she washed her face, brushed her teeth, and used the facilities. Matthew was still asleep, so she brushed her hair and changed into fresh clothes. She could have slept a little more, but Matthew would probably be awake soon, and there was no point in trying to sleep at this point.

  She’d just sat down on the bed and reached for her phone when Matthew whimpered, and she stroked his back, whispering to him. His warm body was soft against her side, and she wondered what it would be like to have one of her own. She’d wanted a baby for a long time, but she was realistic. Saku was never going to be a provider, not for her, and certainly not for any children they had. Hell, he hadn’t even been able to provide for himself. Toward the end, she’d let him know that it bothered her, that she wanted more from him, and that had probably been what pushed him into someone else’s bed.

  It wasn’t about being rich. She hadn’t grown up wealthy and was perfectly happy with the basics as long as they had a roof over their heads, food to eat, and a few extras now and then. Saku hadn’t wanted to work at all, and he’d been more interested in get-rich-quick schemes than any kind of career. He’d told her once that Miikka would take care of them since he made millions of dollars a year, and in retrospect, that might have been the beginning of the end in her subconscious.

  She scooped up Matthew, who was getting fussy again, and went downstairs.

  “Good morning, Miss Tara.” Wenda, the Caldwells’ housekeeper, smiled at her. “Are you hungry? I heard Matthew crying half the night.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry,” Tara said. “I tried to keep him quiet, but he was miserable.”

  “It’s okay. He can’t help it, poor thing.” She tickled his toes, and Matthew gave her a half-hearted giggle.

  “I’m afraid he’s getting sick,” Tara admitted. “I don’t mind caring for him, but I wish Gage or Laurel were here to help me decide if I should take him to the doctor.”

  “Luckily, I’m back.” Gage walked into the kitchen with a grin and immediately reached for his son, holding him in one arm and putting his cheek against the baby’s. “Hmm, he feels a little warm. Wenda, would you find a thermometer and I can take his temp wh
ile we talk.”

  “I took his temperature last night, and it was 99.1, so I wasn’t too worried.”

  “We’ll check it again.” He rocked Matthew gently. “Anyway…”

  “Uh-oh.” Tara grimaced. “Bad news?”

  “Well, not bad news, but it’s not good news.”

  “Crap.” She poured a cup of coffee.

  “I don’t know what’s going to happen with your visa, but I’m getting nervous. My contact at the state department said things aren’t looking good with immigration right now, and your safest bet, if you really want to stay, is to get married.”

  She sighed and took a sip of coffee. She’d already considered this, but it really wasn’t the direction she wanted to go. A marriage of convenience sounded…well, inconvenient as hell. She’d jokingly brought it up to Miikka’s teammate, Logan Pelletier, who was also her friend, and while he’d said he’d do it, she hadn’t thought he was serious. That, and she really didn’t want to marry him. He was a nice enough guy, but younger than her, a total man-whore on the team, and a wild child in general. It wouldn’t be good for either of them to be in a fake marriage that immigration officials might be checking on. What if they caught him with someone else?

  “I can see this doesn’t sound like a good idea to you,” Gage said after holding the thermometer against Matthew’s forehead.

  “Not exactly what I thought getting married would be like, but there’s the bigger problem of finding someone to marry me.”

  He shrugged. “if it’s just a marriage of convenience, I’m sure I have any number of friends who’d be willing to do it for me, if nothing else.”

  “I don’t know if I could marry a stranger,” she said slowly, “especially if I had to live with them.”

  “What about Logan?” he asked.

  “Yes, I could marry Logan. We’re friends, and he’s a good guy, but I think it would be complicated.”

  “I’m sorry, Tara. I thought I could make this happen, but visas and green cards seem to be harder and harder to get.”